Happy day

Smile.

I wanted to write a nice happy post today. Though I still worry I am also very happy for this pregnancy.

I have written post after post about the negatives but I really haven’t posted about how truly happy I am to have reach this point. I had lost hope a few times that achieving pregnancy would ever be possible. Now that I am pregnant it’s strange and scary but it all stems from how much we want this baby.

Even though we have been trying for some time it is still shocking every moment I realize hey I am pregnant. This is a true blessing for us and the dream is coming true and funny thing is I keep thinking, I did it once how soon can we try for s second.  I feel selfish for thinking it but it feels so good.  I can’t wait for my belly to grow and to show it off and spread the word. I want to enjoy this even if something bad happens I have what I have right now. If something goes wrong either way my heart will break, at least I can enjoy it while I can.

Yesterday we told my dad at his birthday dinner. When I say we I mean my hubby, he so badly wants to tell everyone. I figured it was ok because I doubt my dad will go out and tell anyone. So it was a win win, hubby got to tell someone and my dad got great bday news. He was very happy for us and it was nice to hear as it’s the first family we have told together. He offered any support he gave give, which is great as I am sure we will need it.

We had a second ultrasound last week so we know the baby is growing just as we hoped for. There wasn’t a lot to see but it was enough to make me feel more at peace. We go back on June 12th for the week seven ultrasound where we should see a heartbeat and more fetal development.

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week 6.5 am i still pregnant

Chips Ahoy! chocolate chip cookies

Chips Ahoy! chocolate chip cookies (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

 

Hi everyone, sorry for my disappearance after my last post.  Nothing bad has happened we had a bit of an impromptu trip to southern California/Disneyland.

 

So my first three betas were; 38, 83, 516 so they doubled as hoped.

 

All I can think about for the last two days is that I am not sure if I am still pregnant. Why, because my cramps are subsiding and I don’t have morning sickness. My appetite has changed back to relatively normal. Sure there are other symptoms still there like my sore boobs, I haven’t felt my boobs up this much this often in my life, I strangely feel like a 12-year-old boy who is feeling boobs for the first time. Why do I feel them up so much… to see if I am still pregnant crazy I know but it’s my symptom.  Food has not really been amazing but I did have a strange craving for famous Ann’s chocolate chip cookies, how I know this is a craving is that never in my life have I wanted them. We were at whole foods when the craving came on so I bought some whole foods brand thinking this will work…WRONG. Went to target and found a box, I even opened the box (ok my husband opened the box) I eat the cookies in the store. While some of you might not think twice about doing this I have been big on never doing this because I was traumatized by my aunt at a young age.

 

I am going nuts over not knowing if this baby is there and is going to stick around. I even start to get some serious mood swings over it. They last about 10minutes and poor hubby gets the blunt of them. Oh other side effect that I don’t know is common but I am running so hot. I could live in an ice box and still be hot. Oh and I have itchy skin all over and if I scratch they turn into bumps. Does anyone else itch? I lathered up in lotion which helped some.

 

My first u/s is next Wednesday I should be 7.5 weeks. My friend and my hubby both think I should ask to come in sooner to help ease my nerves. But I am really trying hard to stick it out. Though I may lose my mind it will be worth it right!!!???? OMG I had a very graphic nightmare last night that I had M/C. Oh my gosh I woke up with a racing heart and great fear. To make matter worse I lied to my hubby again and told him I didn’t know what my nightmare was about. Why did I lie he wouldn’t of been mad or anything, its long to be a long week.

 

I am now going to go finish the box of cookies and take my 2nd prenatal. I got new ones from the health food store and they don’t make me burp B12 or fish and thus I will take them.

 

Fellow TTC’ers once you get a BFP the battle just begins while I am not sad and depressed like the end of most cycles I am going crazy trying to control my emotions of not getting too excited and emotions of is it over.

 

Sorry for my lack of posts I will be back in full force soon!

 

Cheers,

 

Mrs. W

 

Lab test results

Oh my goodness, I really enjoyed all the great feedback I got from everyone after my last post. It was so awesome to be able to tell people because we have only told three other people that are close to us and know that we have been TTC (none are family, that’s the next post). You are all so wonderful.

First to the blood test results, I just got the actual numbers from the OB today.  I did the first draw on Tuesday afternoon after I got the Positive HCG test.  The Hcg level on Tuesday was on the low side of the scale at 38 but my doctor was happy that by Thursday (48hrs later) the level doubled. Ii do not have the number yet for the Thursday test. All I know is she was satisfied and asked if I wanted to retest on Monday to see if the number double x2 by then. Of course I want too!! I need to know now if this is a sticky baby and not something to get my hopes up too high over.  Does anyone think I should worry of the low HCG level??

Now onto things I have done that I probably shouldn’t have done.

First I had a scare Thursday night. I woke up around midnight from stomach pains that were even in my dreams!! I thought maybe my stomach was upset then I thought the worst. I did have some ever so slight bright pink spotting, which only fueled the fear fire. I couldn’t sleep and I couldn’t control thinking the worst was about to happen.  I decided to watch the Grey’s anatomy I had recorded earlier in the night and it didn’t help that was the episode where Grey falls down the stairs nine months pregnant and then goes into labor (sorry if I just spoiled it for anyone who hasn’t seen it yet). I was encouraged to go back to sleep with the Hubby and was able to fall back to sleep. First thing I did when I opened my eyes was to check things out. Good news everything was back to normal aka no more spotting. The worst part of the whole incidence was for some reason when my hubby asked if I was spotting was that I lied and said no. Why??? I don’t know, I guess I didn’t want to scare him too.  How long before I stop checking for AF??  I do it every time which has increased because of the frequent pee trips to the bathroom.

Second thing I did which I know is a big no no is I bought this maternity dress from Target that I had previously spotted and liked and wanted but I wasn’t pregnant. This time hubby couldn’t say you’re not pregnant so shouldn’t get it. Not only did I buy it but I paid full price, again something I don’t love to do because I swear everything goes on sale at target after I buy it. Oh but wait I also scoped out the sale rack which I love to do and found another maternity top marked way down to less than ten buck so I had to buy it too. While the TTC’er in me knows this could bring bad karma the frugal part of me was satisfied. I know i probably wont be that big this summer but i still like it! Oh and i cant wear it to class yet because the pregnant girl in class has the same dress, and yes i was envious when i saw her wearing it after i had already wanted it.

 

Dress i had to have!

Dress i had to have!

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Shirt i paid 6 something for.

Shirt i paid 6 something for.

Can you tell i love the color coral!

While I know those are no no’s we have also been getting a little ahead of ourselves with thinking in the future. We have been trying for so long and all that time I have worked so hard in not thinking too far in the future but as soon as I saw that positive (once the shock wore off) I let all those what if’s and now we can’s come flooding in. For heaven’s sake it’s only been four days and I don’t even feel pregnant and I am already thinking of this and that and all the things we have to start doing right now. Don’t laugh but on that list is; start buying diapers and wipes,  the room we would like for our child is the storage room/gym and so we need to switch all those things to another room, I need to clean the house top to bottom before I get nausea or too big, MONEY, do we buy a house now or wait etc…. My hubby is less than thrilled, in fact I have him cleaning the carpets and the couches right now, to be fare they needed to be done now either way.

Also sorry for taking so long to post, but Thursday I kind of over did it running errands and had a bad night sleep so I laid on couch pretty much all day.

Not sure if I will keep this up but here are the week 4updates:

Symptoms: Sore boobs, peeing frequently, and hot flashes (not sure if this is pregnancy related but it keeps happening)

Thank you all for being so supportive it really makes me so very happy.

Still pregnant,

Mrs. W.

Be prepare to beblown away

Are you sitting down??

Tuesday AM when i still had not seen AF i decided to do a HCG test. Nothing to abnormal right, another cycle another preg test. Well to be utter shock i got a BFP.

If you have been following my last few post i had written this cycle off and was looking into IVF. So i think i still don’t believe it to be true and either does hubby. Really i still keep check to see if Af is coming and with every lil cramp i think “Oh there it is”. I emailed my OB and she sent in for blood work. Which i still haven’t received the results from. However this morning i had another positive and tomorrow i go in for the 48hr blood work. Fingers crossed my numbers are doubling!! it will be a big hurdle for us to reach.

I we are in shock and it really isn’t sinking in. In fact when i showed hubby the positive test he went back to sleep after (WTF). I really don’t want to put the cart before the horse so i am not going to let myself get too emotionally attached as we all know so many things can happen in the next few weeks. I was going to wait to post this tomorrow or when we get some blood work confirmation but couldn’t hold it in.

We are happy but in shock and even a little what did we do. I guess this is what happens when you TTC. After nearly and a half and seven IUI’s countless meds we have a BFP. I cant tell you how strange it is to get to write this post, after reading so many others and slightly loosing a bit of hope with each passing cycle. I hope other TTC’ers find hope that it can and will happen for them too. I know it can be hard to read these post, but this is just as much a new journey of uncertainties starting for me.

Keep you posted!

Cheers,

Mrs. W.